Show Recap 1/26/11 - Milwaukee Auditions

  I've been encouraged to start blogging auditions by some of my readers (If you haven't checked out the recaps at http://www.topidolblog.com/  you absolutely should get over there ASAP).   So, even if the "truth about american Idol" posts come down, those should stay up.  Here's the first one, enjoy!
1/26/11 - American Idol Recap by Maria Saint

Show begins and apparently it's 8:45 in Milwaukee on 10/2/2010... I don't believe that for one minute.  One, we already know that the judges weren't actually there on 10/2, and more importantly, I don't think Steven Tyler has ever been up that early in his entire rockstar life, but I digress.   They are singing an Aerosmith song.  Imagine that.   ST is as rocked out as usual, and Randy is wearing some crazy sweatshirt that seems to be telling us goodbye while smiling at us.  Is that a preview of what he's about to do to contestants in this city?

The new intro starts and EVERY time I see it I think I've accidentally changed the channel to Entertainment Tonight.  What is up with it anyway?  We see the typical crowd shots, the famous local celebrity (Danny Gokey), and a really good view of the wristband line.   I love J-Lo's outfit too, even though I don't quite understand what it is.  As the judges wait to go in, we get our first Steven Tylerism & ST curse word in the same sentence!  Impressive. It was something about slapping babies on the backside, although he didn't say it as nicely and he was very Billy Ray Cyrus for a second.

Auditions today are at the Milwaukee Art Museum.  I'm not surprised at all by the location-- I think there is an AI rule that the judges need to be in front of a big wall of glass in front of a large body of water.  Is this so they have somewhere to jump if it gets too crazy in there?   ST sings (or shouts) a little, and here's the count so far:

Number of times Steven Tyler has sung:  2                          Number of times contestants have sung:  0

There are more people from outside of Wisconsin that actually came from there, but that seems to be the deal with all of the audition sites so far.

Scotty McCreery is the first contestant of the day and he's a cute kid.  Reminds me of the boy Ben that used to be on that Bravo Model show (http://www.bravotv.com/make-me-a-supermodel/bio/ben-dichiara) combined with the MAD comic book character.   He's described as the All-American boy, and his baseball coach speaks, which tells us he's of course going to be good,  He's a sweet kid, sings country, and has sang his whole life.   As he sings Bye Baby Bunting, someone screams some AWFUL scream in the background-- did anyone else hear that?  Scotty sings country and for once Steven Tyler is silent.  Fantastic!  Bring on the country singers.    His voice is surprisingly low and he made J.Lo smile.   ST asks for something more modern, he sings more country and allows Randy to talk about something he produced.
Uh oh, time for STism #2 and ST curse word #2.... something about having sex with ducks.     Interesting note here is that the camera men cannot keep their laughter in so they are forced to pan out and show you how many people are in that room.  Scotty tells us he hears cursing in high school a lot, they let him through, and we move on.

It's 10 am and apparently auditions are off to a strong start although we have only seen 1 person.  Another shot of the crowd and the city news, radio, and cameras.  Here comes Joe Repka, high fiving everyone.   I already know they are setting him up because they've taken him outside to have a private chat with Seacrest.  Something about he wants to be in radio.  Those are good aspirations, and he seems like a nice enough kid.  Seacrest makes him say a radio call about 100 times, and he seems to be taking it in good stride.  They show a clip about how he says "I seem to be doing that a lot"  --  but I'm not convinced it was in regards to talking like a radio announcer.   And here's a note to you, kids:   If Seacrest spends more than 5 minutes with you before it's your turn to go in, it cannot be good.  Remember that.  They then show Joe dancing in a room with a blue AI logo.

I have a new theory, dear readers, allow me to test it out on you tonight.  For the past few episodes, I've been noticing that lots of one camera interviews are being done, without Seacrest present, of contestants that are about to go in the room.  Two differences here-- one, some people's videos are long and continuous and unedited, while other people's looked chopped together.  I have noticed that the long and continuous, open-ended talking videos are of "good" contestants, and the choppy videos are of "bad contestants."  I have also noticed that the "bad" contestants generally appear to be in front of a blue screen with AI on it, while good contestants tend to be in a white room, or in another location all-together (but usually the white room).   I am not sure if this blue screen is a private room somewhere in the audition site, or a background edited in later, but for now I will call it the "Blue Screen of Death".   My hypothesis is that any time you see a contestant in front of this blue screen, they will be portrayed badly.  Let's see if this pans out. Back to Joe Repka.  He doesn't do well, shocker, but he does diss Seacrest by saying he doesn't listen to his radio program.  He sings some Billy Joel and ST of course joins in.    The count is now:

# of ST songs:   3    # of contestant songs: 1

Joe fires back with a "I can't help falling in love",  upping the contestant count, but ST joins in as well!

ST songs: 4   Contestant Songs:  2

Joe exits, is very good-natured, and gives another call out.  Good for him.  I hope he gets a radio job.

Next up is the cheesiest segue of all time about radio, and then radio in cars, and then 15 year old Emma Henry.  She reminds me of a really young Lindsey Lohan.  We see some long tape about how she just learned how to drive (was it a slow news day?  I don't remember how "driving" is something no other contestant has done before).   She's got a great raspy tone to her voice and is different, sings a Cyndi Lauper song that's perfect for her. I like her, the judges think she will get eaten up in Hollywood.  I'm just happy ST doesn't know any Cyndi Lauper.   They let her through. Nothing else significant here except that she cried her eyes out, kind of proving the point about her getting eaten up.

ST songs: 4   Contestant songs: 3

Back inside we have 4 contestants all pieced together which is usually an indication that they are all going to be awful, and they are.  I'm really surprised by the amount of guys singing Gaga, and even more surprised that they all seem to have the same hand movements and dancing.  Not sure if they are moves from a Gaga video, or if this frantic dancing/clapping is encouraged by producers.   Ironic that all guys singing Gaga feel the need to dance, although maybe not.   They are all terrible and none of them get through.  There's really nothing funny or interesting here, except:

ST songs:  4    Contestant songs:  7   (making a mad comeback!)

One contestant asks for a sip of Randy's coke.  Randy tells him to go get some Coke Zero outside.

Naima Adedapo is a janitorial worker at Summerfest, is very Rasta looking (colorful jewelry, red/yellow/green, dreads) with 2 beautiful girls.  She's original and with a great voice.  The judges love her.  I think she's really talented, but isn't really anything I've seen before.  Definitely talented enough where she doesn't need to be a janitor.   Randy loves her colors and all of the judges love her.  She sings Donnie Hathaway (another one ST doesn't know). 

Back from break and I get a closer look at Jennifer's outfit, although I still can't figure out what it is. I love the pink and silver combination, am just unsure about whether it's a frilly vest, or who knows.  But I don't have the time to deliberate that right now. The cameras are zooming around the audition space, and we see people doing limbo with a giant toothbrush (?!?!)  and then someone doing gymnastics down a hallway accidentally landing on someone's face/chest.  Who gave the guy on the floor that camera to hold? Someone wanted the shot and then asked a poor contestant to lie there and get it for him? And you know they had done that a few times before they actually rolled tape.  I feel sorry for the guys but neither of them seem hurt so we move on.

A bad Jenny on the Block, the owner of the giant toothbrush, (a 54 year old dentist-- I hope he got his business out there),  and now a Barmitzvah singer, Jerome Bell.   Who's got a really big voice.  Almost too big.  It was very very loud and abrasive to me, but nice tone and great sound.  Just overly amplified to me.  I guess those Barmitzvah kids are usually really loud.   ST does his crazy rabbit-face dance,  JLo describes him as "loud, soft, sweet, powerful..."   I thought those words were contradictory, but I guess everyone's entitled to a Paula-ism now and then.  Jerome is through and everyone is happy. 

This brings the total to ST  4  C  11... it almost seems like the show is finally about other people singing!

The next few minutes were about Seacrest trying to explain Bieber fever, I wasn't even listening.  Then we see a precious little 5 year old singing.   I dont' really care because it brings the total up to

ST 4  C 12

Apparently Bieber fever was to explain 15 year olds and we get our next contestant, Theia Megia.  Song is Chasing Pavements by Adele and her voice is extremely mature for a 30 year old, much less a 15 year old... and strange, but in a good way.  The judges seem as confused by it as me and they love it as well.  Steven makes a comment about how he loves the heat "down there"  and I'm really hoping he's thinking about the correct diaphragm.   He then finds an excuse to sing something that doesn't even make sense, so we have

ST 5  C 12

Theia is through with all 3 judges saying yes and all of the other 15 year olds get through as well.  This is positive, this means they aren't purposely trying to humiliate 15 year olds.  They only let the good 15 year olds through to the last round.  Producers earn 1 heart point, and they pan to the obligatory boat sailing on the lake behind the glass behind the judges.

Next up is Nathaniel Jones, a civil war re-enactor.  They are playing ridiculous music so I automatically know where this is going.  They show him running and screaming which I'm also pretty sure re-enactors don't do, and oh, here's Secreast with him for 5 minutes.  Great.  The positive part of this is Nathaniel screaming "Don't try me, man!!!!"  at Seacrest.  Ha.   Oh, and the quote of the evening: "Hippies believe in sex!"  Nathaniel sings the Lion Sleeps Tonight and I really don't see THAT big of a problem with it, I have to admit.  It's super high in key, but all the pitches seem correct and it actually sounds to me exactly like the recording, but I think he killed it with the sex talk and war outfit.   Plus, NOBODY talks to Ryan Seacrest that way!  Nathaniel "becomes another casualty of the day"--- oh Seacrest, you are so witty!

Mason Wilkinson comes in and needs to turn around and compose himself, probably because his feet aren't in the right place on the Idol emblem (either side of the o).  He turns around, gets it right, and starts singing a song I've never heard of.  On the bright side, ST hasn't heard it either.  Randy laughs.  Awkward silence.  Judges vote no. 

ST 5  C 13

Then we have Molly De-Wolf Swenson... graduated from Harvard and has a random White House internship. Nice to know people can "randomly" get jobs at the White House.  She gives an interview and no blue screen so we seem to be good (although they do take her picture in front of it).  She's also giving long ended sentences so she should be good.   Ha, turns out Randy punched her in the face-- hilarious.  We also see the back of his ridiculous jacket-- it's telling us to study about organic.  Will have to look that up later.  She corrects Randy and slips in that she graduated from Harvard and works at the White House so she's obviously proud, maybe a little too proud but she can sing.   She's got good range, and it was a decently interesting arrangement.  Not one I've heard before.  We hear a bunch of contestants screaming during this, not sure if they heard her singing or not.  (It seems that they have monitors outside this year, but not confirmed).  They let out screams though about a full minute after she ended though so not sure what that is all about. Judges vote, and she's through.  I'm left asking the question I have been asking a lot lately-- why are some people super talented at EVERYTHING and others have what seems like zero gifts?     Harvard, White House, pretty, good voice.  So unfair.   But I digress again and Day 1 is over.  

Day 1 Homework:  Find out what Study About Organic means...   The only thing I can find is about a company called Adios (which makes sense given the front of his jacket)  and their studies on organic food products... there isn't too much about it except on a food gossip sites, all written this week, none mention Randy Jackson.  He's a big proponent of eating health food though so I guess it makes sense.  Here's one of the few links I found if you're interested.  http://gossipblower.com/2011/01/26/a-healthier-much-more-confident-you-with-adios-and-adios-max/

A ton of commercials more and it now seems like 4 hours from when I started watching this show (and probably feels like 6 hours since you started reading this blog!)  Why is the New Orleans episode (the only one I really cared about) 1 hour, and the rest seem like they take infinity and beyond.  ST looks ridiculous as always, JL as chic, and Randy's just a dawg.   We show the arena again like it's the next day even though we know it's really 10am the day before.   One kid sings the Lion King intro though so I guess it's worth it.   Wow, under JLo's chic coat she's got the cutest little top with a Treble Clef on it.  With Randy's initial sweater on I'd feel like I were in the 50s if it weren't for ST's crazy 70s ensemble.  

First up is Hailey Reinhart. She's super talented but I see why she didn't make it last time.  She's putting EVERYTHING she's got in there... so many loops and trills and ups and downs that I feel like I do when I puke on rollercoasters, but it was impressive.  She's through and she's excited.  She runs back to show all of the other contestants.  Just in case they didn't see it her Dad lifts her up.
ST curses AND sings, bringing our count up to

ST 6  C 13

Next is someone named Tiwan Strong.  He seems kind of crazy, but no blue screen of death, so I'm having good thoughts.  He is great.  Kind of just like everyone else who sings 50s and 60s music (Twisting the Night Away is his song)  but it's positive.  I also like his entirely white ensemble.   ST likes him, Randy likes him, JLo said he did a really good job.  He's through and his family is super excited-- a bunch of screaming women!   They practically maul him and it's actually a really cute scene.  One of the ladies gets a Charlie Horse, the other starts doing some crazy dancing and kicking. Seacrest is left holding the charlie horse lady which is hysterical as he tiries to figure out what to do and then gives her a leg massage.  I wish I had a picture of that scene of them both bent over to photoshop. Seacrest gives her some lame advise about drinking plenty of water and we move on.

ST 6  C 14

Next, Steve Beghun (pronounced "big goon"), a CPA.  I guess he's playing hooky so they make a big deal out of it and he seems super boring and says he has no friends.   He has the white screen behind him though so it looks good (my theory is holding up so far).  He seems like a dork as he can't open the door and makes a bad joke about his name.  His voice SHOCKS me.  It's half country, half pop with a really sweet tone.   He's through and has like 6 people with him... I thought he didn't have any friends?  They are all wearing primary colors!    He goes back into the tent also to show the contestants his golden ticket.  I can't say I wouldn't do the same thing.

ST 6 C 15

Next up is Vernika Patterson singing Loving You and she's been challenged to see if she can make it a 4 for 4 streak for contestants, so there's already a pretty good idea of where this is going.   It starts not bad but then she stops.  She re-starts, changes keys, changes again halfway through, and yet again in the lalalas until she gets to the right one but still can't hit the high note.   I don't know GREAT singers that can sing this song, I don't know why anyone would pick it for an audition. They tell her no and she appears to give instant attitude, but we don't know what happens so I'll give her the benefit of the doubt.  I hear another massive scream from the other contestants and I finally figure out that it's the reaction to the other contestants with the yellow tickets running back into the staging area.     Vernika picks up her things to leave, her mom or whoever wants her to stay to give the exit interview, she tries to escape the other way and there's a cameraperson waiting for her on the other side of the glass door.  Ha!  American Idol 1 Vernika 0.   Oh, and speaking of counts, it's now:

ST 6  C 16...  (i was really getting worried for awhile when ST had half as many singing moments as contestants)

Montage of people crying and screaming, many of them are followed all the way to the parking lot and saying get away from me, get the camera away, some hit the camera but all 3 of those people were outside so who knows how long they had been followed at that point. Sigh. 

Back inside, we have a Barack Obama impersonator, but he really seems like  a Kenan Thompson impersonator.   Name is Albert Rogers III.  Then comes something about fudge and Eleanor Rigby  making for the 3rd ST ism of the day.  Randy was rude, he thought it was terrible and a joke. All 3 judges say no, and he's gone.  They show him against the Blue Screen of Death and he gives a nice little speech.

Scott Dangerfield is next and ST accuses him of wearing lipstick, to which he says he was kissing one of the girls outside.  "Fell in love in the Idol line" is discussed as a possible song...  he's a cutie, oh and crap, now ST is singing again.   Scott sings and his voice is amazing... this kid gets laid a LOT, I bet.  If he doesn't, he will. He sort of reminds me of Clay Aiken but with way more game.  Even his posture seems "I am sexy and awesome."  Ha.  He explodes into the tent and a loud scream erupts.  We're now to

ST 7  C 17

Next we meet a girl who is obsessed with Green Bay Packers, yet she is wearing a shirt with American Flags on it--  nothing about her screams Green bay actually, except for the accent.   I guarantee you they urged her to run around and do the wave, high fives, lead the cheers, etc.  The crowd went with it too so they didn't think it was that weird at the time.   But she's billed as the most annoying girl ever. Megan Frazier.  She's beautiful and I love her energy..   her notes are on and she actually has a pretty good opera voice.  I am really wondering if she's been put up to this. I bet she has.   I'd bet money on it.  Opear is playing in the background as she walks out, I wonder if it's her singing or not.  And who can blame her fandom, after all, her team IS going to the Superbowl!

ST 7 C 18

Time for our first rock and roll chick, Alyson Jados.  so far she cries and freaks out a lot.  ST is mesmorized by her.  He immediately says she looks like she could be one of his ____.   Thankfully he didn't finish the sentence.  He starts talking in a smoky voice.. "tell me about yourself."  -- his next question is "what are you into"  and covers it up with "...to sing?"   then she confesses she's an Aerosmith groupie.  Great. I hope someone rented Alyson Jados a hotel room for tonight. I also hope she's okay with listening to ST sing every 5 minutes.  She's great though.   I don't know how ST didn't sing along or drum to this one!   Finally ST picks up singing with her, they vote and here's another observation about this season, the judges vote in different order each time and sometimes vote no on purpose to give whoever likes the contestant the most the deciding "yes" vote.

ST 8  C 18

Back from the break and they sit us through repeats of all of the people that have been through before.  Didn't we just see this an hour ago?

Finally up is Chris Medina who has a story that can top even Danny Gokey's.  His financee Juliana was in a terriblle car accident just 2 months before their supposed-to-be wedding.  Beautiful girl.  Now she's brain damaged and has been that way for over a year and a half and he has been her primary caregiver since then.  He sings Break Even which is a great choice.  He's good but not great but his story and soul come through in every note.   After his touching performance they bring Juliana in and even I'm shocked by how bad her condition seems.   There is a big party with judges and family.   Note for auditioners #3, if you'er ever an Idol contestant and you're saved for last- that's also a great sign :)

Homework #2:  research this story further.  I found a website where Chris is trying to raise $8000.00 for an experimental procedure that is not covered by insurance --  as of last night he surassed that mark with a bunch of $25 paypal donations, probably from Idol viewers...   if you'd like to visit the site, here it is:  http://www.laurusfoundation.org/help-juliana-ramos.php    -- Last night, this site was at $9250, now it's over $22,000!   Wow for the power of television.

That's it folks.  Sorry it's so long.  These shows need to be shorter!
Here's our final count:

Steven Tyler Isms:  3
Steven Tyler Obscenities:  2
Steven Tyler Songs:  8  (almost 1/3 of the total # of songs of the day!)
Contestant Songs:  18
# of Contestants Steven Tyler Hit On: surprsingly, 1
J-Lo Cute Outfits:  2
Randy Self-Promotion:  1
Contestants in 2 hours:  18.   About 1 every 7 minutes.

Also remember,  Seacrest interview before:  bad,  blue screen of death:  bad, white screen:  good, camera-man interview before at your house: good,  football/baseball coach interview: good, last auditioner of the day: good.

xoxo,
Maria Saint 

Two polls...

1)  Am considering quitting my day job and become a writer.    Good move, or bad move?
           What other Idol topics would you like to see covered?  What other non-Idol topics interest you?

2)  Am considering putting up audio only of my audition pieces.  How do y'all feel about that?  You've shared so much with me, I really want to share more with you!

We're not going anywhere yet.

Previously, I said Goodbye.  I thought it was about time for this blog to hit to road.  It's been a pleasure writing it,  I've saved it all for my personal journal to look back on and show my grandchildren in many years, and eventually I will pull it down, but not yet.

To all of you who read the blog:  THANK YOU.   I only meant it to be for my friends and a few others, and believe me when I say, I never thought more than 200 people would come here.  It's been about 2000 a day.

To all of you who still think I'm lying:  To each his own.  You're entitled to your own beliefs.  I ask you two things,  1) To keep an open mind in the future when watching AI (or any reality show for that matter), and 2)  Not to be so harsh when laughing at the rejects.  It takes a lot of guts to do something like that and as you've probably guessed from what I've told you, what you see is not always what it seems.

To those of you who e-mailed or commented that you enjoyed my writing style or my content:  I very much appreciate that.  I'm pretty sure all of you came here for the content and the popularity of the show, and not necessarily the writing, but I'm hoping that's what kept you here.  I am looking for a freelance blogging and/or writing job, so if anyone is looking for one, e-mail me at the truedat504@gmail.com e-mail address.

I hate surprises and goodbyes, so I'll keep this up for another ?? approximately. (There have been lots of consults with legal people and things like that which made me scared and made me decide to take it down... I still WILL, but we are so close to 10,000 views, and it's not even been up a full week, so I think maybe it should stay up at least until Thursday.)  So, for those of you who were planning on suing me- you can rest easy after that... please just give the readers that long to read it.  If you know anyone who still needs to read this, please send them here in a hurry.  Update: 10,000 hits in 7 days.  Thanks everyone!  That's a huge deal to me... I'm so happy that so many read and enjoyed this blog.

Until next time...   I have compiled this list of a few websites I think you should check out.  They have nothing to do with American Idol, but they are all very deserving of you reading them.  I've included a link and a brief description for all of them.    I figured I could at least leave you with some good reading material.  I may write on one of them, (coughmailcough) I may not.. ;)   If you like my writing style though and what I have to say, check them all out!

Websites I think are awesome:

Tiny Dolls - really cute graphics and quotes... a ton a day  http://tinydolls.tumblr.com/
Mail to Males - real girls' true letters to real boys... they are hilarious!  http://mailtomales.tumblr.com/
Designs of Tumblr - graphic design, jewelry, all sorts of crafty stuff  http://designsof.tumblr.com/
What I Wore - this chick photographs what she wears every day http://whatiwore.tumblr.com/
Simple Dude in a Complex World - name says it all  http://www.thesimpledude.com/ (blogspot)
http://www.joshduffy.com/  - Not an AI contestant, but a great guy, and good music too!
Enjoy these! I do a lot... so if you enjoyed my blog, you likely will too.



Keep following your dreams,
Maria Saint

Golden Tickets

 Lots of you don't believe me on the Golden Ticket Marks (N, K, Y)...   and I agree with you that maybe I'm wrong about what they mean, but I KNOW I'm right  that they exist.  I present to you, exhibit B.  I found these one or two pictures posted freely online... just by googling "American Idol golden ticket"  --  one is from season ten, one is from many years ago.  I edited out these people's names because I do not have their permission to post them..  however, if you google what I googled I'm sure you'll find them too.  One is on a website, the other on a person's flickr page.  Here are those two pictures below.

The third picture is my very own golden ticket.  I edited out both my name and contestant number because I know you people are crafty and you can probably track me down.  If you can't, the AI folks certainly can look it up.   I did take a picture of my nails on that day though, a) because they were super cute  and b) because you can see them in the golden ticket picture.  Not that I REALLY care if you don't believe me, but considering I had this picture I included it.

The Truth About American Idol -- FAQ's

If you haven't read parts 1-9 yet, you may want to do that before you read these FAQs.  It's only in response to people who have sent in questions who have read parts 1-9.
 will add to this as necessary.     The other posts are still here... just click on "older posts"  for them.
If you're going to read any of them though, please read #9.  That's the most important one.   Lots of people have just been reading #1 and #7.  This one is sort of important too, I guess.

1.   Q: Do you answer every e-mail you get?
       A:  So far, yes, I try to answer every question in great detail (surprised? Ha!).   E-mail anything you want to ask to truedat504@gmail.com.   Would rather you do that than write awful things about me in blogs, but hey, I wrote some pretty harsh things so I guess we're all entitled to our own opinions! :)

2.   Q:  Why did you write this blog?   Aren't you just trying to get a reaction from the Idol people?
      A:   Nope. When I wrote parts 1 and 2 back in July, it was for two reasons - 1) to let contestants in other cities know the process, because I couldn't find anything online when I searched to find what to wear, what time to show up, was it really necessary to camp out overnight, etc.   and 2)  Blogging is a really good way to record your opinions for later on.  I experienced Hurricane Katrina and one of my biggest regrets is I didn't blog more about it at the time... memory fades (I said that in Part 9 even) and people forget.   I learned a lot from this experience and I personally wanted a record of that.   I was very careful not to include too many details about how I felt or what I thought in the beginning... it was factual, scrapbook types of things, "we got there at __ o'clock, and did ___."   As opposed to "We are happy because we met a guy named Carl!"    If you look carefully I was super vigilant at all times about NOT mentioning names or throwing people under the bus.    
           Suddenly, 6 months went by, and I forgot about it, and hoped other people did too- but suddenly January happened and there were 4 commercials a day on reminding people about the premiere.  People started calling, texting, even my 70 year old neighbors let me know they were going to TiVo it.   They all kept asking questions about "can we come watch it with you?  "what was it like?"  "tell us everything"  .  Since a grand total of 5 people read parts 1-3 in the 6 months it was up, I figured it was safe to begin be a little more liberal with disclosing the really good stuff.   130 of my friends viewed my blog the first two days.  I was really honored by all of their support.    I also wanted to prepare them for what they (maybe) were going to see.  It's a lot more believable if someone comes out BEFOREHAND and says "Look.  This is what happened.  I probably won't be portrayed favorably, and that's okay with me, and here's why...".    Had I actually been featured in the footage, people would not have believed me after the fact when I said "it's okay, it's all good!"   I've always been guilty of talking too much, sharing too much information, and being ridiculously honest.  I'm sure you have realized that about me already!
            The blog has had over 2000 hits in 2 days, and I am absolutely shocked by that.  I am finding myself on American Idol sites I never even knew existed (although I'm having lots of fun reading them, some good stuff there).     Thanks to everyone who has commented (both positive and negative)--  I've thoroughly enjoyed this discussion.

3.  Q:  Are you just writing this blog because you didn't get famous on American Idol and now you're trying to get famous / rich / a record contract now?
      A:   No.  If I was trying to become famous I would have used my real name.  If I wanted money I would have set up a Cafepress shop and made "The Truth About American Idol" t-shirts.   Admittely, I did set up an AdSense account, but I make 96 cents a day, and a girl's gotta eat somehow.  I spent a lot of time on this blog!    If I wanted a record contract, I would have posted the video of me singing my audition songs.     Keep in mind I also write 3 other blogs.  They barely have 100 readers between the 3 of them.  If I wanted promotion you would see links to my other writing here.   I've actually lost a little sleep over how big this has gotten because I still don't want to get in any kind of trouble, but if I do, I guess we'll just deal with that when it comes.

4.  Q:  Do you hate the American Idol people?  Aren't they just awful?
      A:  No.  They are decent people, they make a great show that I've enjoyed for many years.  I think their ratings have fallen though in recent years and I think they need to strongly consider why.  Although all this "bad audition" hoopla in the beginning is fun for most, it doesn't change the fact that some of the top 20 / top 10 episodes have come pretty boring over the last couple of years.  Most people seem to watch the auditions and watch the top 5, nothing in between.   They are obviously trying to fix this with the addition of the judges and some other rule changes (15 years olds, for example)... but maybe the actual concept needs to slightly change with the way the viewers are changing.  American Idol's not a novelty anymore.

5:  Q:  Do you carefully plot and plan each post?
      A:  Nope.  I actually sit down at my computer, blare either Muse or Taylor Swift (depending on mood) and type.  I rarely ever go back and edit.  I rarely ever stop my train of thought.  It just comes out... it was only supposed to be for me and friends!  I type it as if I type an e-mail.     I went to a really great college, I CAN edit.  I just don't here.  That's probably painfully obvious, right?

6.  Q:   Why did you audition if you knew you weren't going to make it?
     A:  I didn't think there was zero chance that I would make it... after all, I do get at least a dozen paid singing gigs a year.  It's not my career and it's not a lot of money but I must be at least sort of decent if I can get a couple of hundred bucks for a gig here and there and qualify for a professional union.  I didn't think I was what likely they were looking for, but every year "what they are looking for" changes.  One year it's a rocker girl, one year an underprivileged mom, or an older looking dorky gentleman, or a rocker guy, or a country girl, you get the point... it's always changing.  The only people who know who they are looking for is them.   That's kind of the point of auditions.  If I didn't audition for every show or role I wasn't 100% sure I was a shoe-in for, I wouldn't ever audition for anything.   Each audition is an experience, and it teaches you something different.  I also was really interested in how the process worked. Most importantly, a dear friend of mine wanted to go and didn't want to go alone. That was the biggest motivator.  I didn't plan on writing the blog from the beginning (why I took such crappy notes)  but everything just sort of happened.  Even writing this blog has been a huge learning experience, so I am pretty positive auditioning is what I was supposed to do!

7.  Q:  Alexis was killed in a car accident, you dumbass.   I e-mailed you the link to the article.
     A:  Thanks!  I knew she died recently, I knew I was sad by it.  Sorry I got that part wrong!   I know there have been people that committed suicide though after auditions that made press, right?   Feel free to comment here and tell me about it.  Not that I like hearing about that type of thing, but they deserve to be mentioned.    Either way, it really doesn't affect this story or the blog in anyway.  But thanks for the edit, reader!

The Truth about American Idol auditions, Part 9

Personal Reactions / FAQ

I've said an awful lot and you must be sick of me by now, but I just want to leave you with these following points.

I am in no way bitter, upset, or offended by any of this experience.
Was it the greatest experience of my life?  No.   Do I wish I would have made a friend or two out of the auditions that I could still talk to?  Yes.  Am I bitter?  No.   Am I upset that I am not the next American Idol?  Of course, who wouldn't want a million dollar recording deal and to be on TV and be famous.   Yes, I'm upset I'm not the President of the United States or America's Next Top Model also, but we can each only be talented in so many ways.  Singing may not be mine (or maybe it is and I'm just going about it the wrong way, who knows), but I'm not bitter.    Were they mean to me?  No.   Were they nice to me?  No.    Did I fully know what I was getting myself into?   Sort of, that's a tough one.  I knew it was going to be edited, I knew it would be competitive, I knew things would be strange.  I didn't fully expect the level of paranoia that I went through nor did I expect to feel as uncomfortable or nervous as I did at certain points, but that's all ultimately my fault.    I'm still glad I did it and I wouldn't change that for the world.  I would have turned 29 and always wondered what might have been in 2010. (Ha!  Rhyming. Maybe I should be a poet.)

Let me explain the "paranoia" part.
I am not a paranoid person, nor have I ever been.    Correction, I am slightly paranoid.  If I see a scary movie, I am scared to be by myself at night for a few nights.  If I hear that a friend has betrayed me, I might never tell them secrets again.  If I hear someone talking about me I'll forever think they are talking about me, even if they aren't.   I think that's just human nature.  I might be slightly guarded, I think it's called being smart.   But I'm not generally in the mindset that everyone and everything is out to get me.
American Idol auditions were a different case.

Anything in life is going to have those that are good at it and those that are bad.  In corporate America, there are people that are paid better than other people.   In contests, there are 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place winners.  In school, there are grades.  There is always some way to know where you rank, and crude or cruel as it may be, it's nice to know where you stand.

The audition I went to for the other show was such a positive experience, (and keep in mind, please, that I am not a fame whore, well maybe a little bit :)  --  I just want to make it clear that I do not audition for shows all the time.  In my entire adult life I've auditioned for exactly two shows.  It just so happened that they were both within 6 months of each other.  BUT, they both just happened to also come to my city within 6 months of each other.  Opportunities presented themselves and I jumped on them.  In the latter c case I was really lucky (or prepared, however you want to look at it), because I knew where I stood.   I went into an audition, I was called out as being a person of interest.   I survived a cut.  I survived another cut.   In each case, passing through meant that I was good.  I had succeeded.  I had survived.  I would make it through to fight another time/day.   It was always joyous to hear that I was called for the next round.    AI is NOT like that.   You are always wondering if you're being passed through because you are that good or that bad.  You are always questioning the marks on your golden ticket.  You are always asking people what the judges said about them.  You're trying to figure out who's "good" and who's "bad,"  you are constantly trying to decide whether you should drop out of the competition as to not humiliate yourself or if you should continue on and have a chance at something wonderful.   It's pretty unfair, and I  say that even though I knew what I was signing up for, because....

Why it's unfair  /  Why I actually feel sorry for contestants who make it to the "reject reels"
It's not called reject reels officially, that's a name I made up for the boatloads of contestants who crack us up with their ridiculous renditions of anything from "Let My People Go"  to "She Bangs"  to original compositions like "I am Your Brother"  and the list goes on and on and on.  Let me tell you, I won't ever call it that again.    A few facts first.  1.  Contestants KNOW they could be featured for being bad, not for being good.   2.  They are told this well in advance, read papers, and even sign papers regarding this. 3. Contestants have clearly watched the show before and have seen episode after episode of these reject reels.

Hasn't anyone ever wondered why these people continue to audition?  It's because they think they're good.

But unlike the reason you think they're there, because they are delusional and full of themselves, because they think they're wonderful, because they want fame & fortune, or even simply and modestly because their friends/families/voice coaches told them they were good and convinced them to try out,  a good many of them (like me)  tried out because they are big fans of the show, an opportunity presented itself close to home where they could audition,  they've always wondered what could have been, they had a group going with them so they made an outing out of the day, and they just wanted to see what happened.   Had someone at that very first table at the New Orleans Arena been like "Look, I'm sorry, you'er just not good enough,"   and the contestant then responded "please, please, please, let me through, I promise I am awesome, I am so good" -- then yes, I fully blame them for anything they brought upon themselves.   But those producers do NOT tell you you are bad.  In fact they give you falsely encouraging advice.  I was told things like "that was great, the only bad thing I can say about it is that you need to make more eye contact."  and, "you're golden, that was awesome, you're through."  both by the same woman, and then later watched her cover her face with a clipboard as she tried not to laugh at me.  

Tell people the truth.  There ARE people who are there because they want fame and fortune and they will get it at any costs.  These are the people who are dressed in costume, dance on poles, do kart wheels, take off their clothing while singing, jump in pools, write their own songs, you get the idea. You've seen thousands of them throughout the years.  These are the people who don't care what anyone says or thinks about them.  All they want is their 15 minutes.   You have plenty of these people.  Please just let them have their hay day. I'm sure they will be plenty embarrassing enough for you.   They will get you fantastic ratings. But please don't lie to some poor little well dressed kid through 4 rounds about how good he is,  then put him in front of 10-14 people and cameras, tell him he sings bad, laugh at his shocked reaction, and then follow him through the Hilton Riverside as he cries his eyes out.  That's immoral.  That's wrong.

Disclaimer
I'm only human, I'm only fallible.  Parts 1, 2, 3 were written in July and were days after we auditioned.  Those are 100% accurate as they were fresh in my head.  For these other posts I wrote recently (yesterday and today),  they are mostly accurate.  I had some notes, and pictures and videos and things to refer back off of, but some things like names and exact locations and exact words may be slightly off.  If they are, I greatly apologize.  Most things are correct and accurate to the best of my knowledge.  If they are wrong they're how I felt, as given as this is a blog and not a textbook, I think that's okay!   If other contestants who were in New Orleans want to e-mail me or correct something (or add to it) I would absolutely welcome your comments/corrections with open arms.

Will I continue to watch the show?
Maybe.  I'm only human.  It's very very difficult for me to watch the rejec....  the honest people making honest mistakes featurette... because I've bee there and done that.  I know how it feels.   Will I still watch it?  Maybe.  I will definitely speak up for those people if I do, and I definitely won't laugh at them when they cry.  There HAVE been people who have committed suicide over American Idol auditions (that one girl Alexis comes to mind most often... I still think about her from time to time).  I don't think that's American Idol's fault, they had a lot of other deep seated issues, but it certainly started a lot of bullying that probably added to the problem.  I can't help but think about people like her when I watch it now.  But will I still watch it?  Maybe.  I definitely don't look forward to it like I used to.  I didn't even get all the way through the Jersey episode, which has NEVER happened to me before, especially this early in the rej... honest people featurette.  ESPECIALLY in a place as juicy as New Jersey.   But it just didn't hold the same appeal.  Maybe I'm growing up.  Maybe I just have more empathy.  Maybe I have better more productive things to do with my time than watch other people fail and/or succeed (like write blogs!).

Best wishes to American Idol Season 10
I may still watch because of the people I briefly met and liked who are still involved. I want to see them go far and do well.  And for what it's worth, Season 10 definitely seems different than any other season I've ever seen.  There are no quips from Simon (before I would have been as disappointed about that as I am about Steve Carrell leaving The Office) but if I'm feeling sorry for people now I'm glad he's not there.    I understand why Ellen DeGeneres left because she "realized this season that while I love discovering, supporting and nurturing young talent, it was hard for me to judge people and sometimes hurt their feelings."  She obviously knew what the show was about and what she'd be doing before she signed up, I guess she just didn't realize (like I didn't realize) the extent of some of the things that happened.   But it already seems different.  Jennifer Lopez is a beautiful person inside and out, and she's seemingly good intentioned.  I'd much rather laugh at Steven Tyler mouthing along to the lyrics and playing drums for contestants than to watch yet another person breakdown.   I also have noticed that they are hardly showing anything this year....  previous years we might see 25-40 contestants audition per episode, I'm not even sure if we saw 10 audition in New Orleans.  It seemed like there was a lot left out or missing.  I'm not sure of the reason exactly, but I sure am relieved!   Grateful you can only see me through this blog for now (or at least for a little bit longer).

I could give some kind of sappy send off or inspirational quote at this point... but let's just say that I might be back, I might not.  Until then, enjoy reading, feel free to post comments on any of the posts or refer this to other people, and if you have any questions shoot them to truedat504@gmail.com.

xoxo,
Maria Saint

PS -  if no one figured it out yet... the name Maria Saint came from the fact that they said I sounded like a Nun!   Ha!  Nuns are good!   So I have nice Catholic sounding nun name now.

IMPORTANT:  If you came here from a referring site, like Reality Blurred-- they may have just posted individual links.  There IS more after Part 9.  There is secret audio footage... there are pictures... there are recaps of every weeks shows and more behind the scenes information after each Hollywood episode.  So, make sure to go back to http://truedat504.blogspot.com/  to link to the MAIN site,  and read everything to date!  Oh, and you might want to follow on Twitter (@truedat504) or on blogspot to make sure you're kept up to date!

The Truth about American Idol Auditions Part 8

What I haven't told you... yet


The reactions
After each person auditioned, they'd walk out of the double doors back into the room where the family (if there was one) was waiting for them outside.  Of course they'd jump and scream and react appropriately, and the entire thing would be filmed.   What you should know about this:
1)  The family is told exactly where to stand
2)  The family is told exactly what to do
3)  If the families reaction is not good enough (or too good),  they have the reaction repeated so that they can film it from a different camera perspective.   They also make suggestions, like "wave your signs,"  "pick him up and spin him,"  and they are told over and over again to be as energetic and enthusiastic as possible.  People were scolded for just saying "yay" or "congratulations".
4)  All of the other families and contestants (who are sitting between 5-50 feet away)  are not allowed to clap, cheer, scream, talk, or make any noise whatsoever.  They do this because they don't want you to know those people are there.   Think back to my drawing of the double doors with the two potted plants and the row of chairs in front of the door with the first row of contestants and the however many rows of contestants and families behind them.  When you see the contestants running out of the room with the ticket, did you see anyone else around? Nope.   Isn't that slightly odd?   Yep.    Now, in their defense I did not make the very very last round, so they may have moved everyone to a separate holding area by then, but I know they still keep that area roped off (or silenced) to minimize background noise and cheering.

Shock and awe
One particular reaction that I'll never forget is this particular kid was Japanese, and he made it through.  His father was a little heavier, and stockier, and very excitedly put his hands out and stomped his feet a few times.   They asked him to do that over and over, louder and louder with his feet, and slower and slower.  Eventually he looked like Godzilla.  You get the idea.  It didn't take long for them to get the perfect footage, just by saying "oh, can you do that again?  why don't you REALLY stomp those feet this time!"      That memory will always haunt me and everytime I see them showing somebody doing something ridiculous now (clapping, screeching, doing a penguin imitation, whatever), I'm always secretly wondering if a producer or production person asked them "Hey, you know what would be neat? Can we get you twirling around like a little ballerina?  Okay, great!"

Creative editing
You probably already gathered this already from virtually all of my past posts but this is so important I'll say it again.  It's obviously been edited.    The audition process took 4-5 days, they condensed it to one.  People are wearing the same clothing past the point that deodorant can help them.  Songs that were sung in private, separately with just one camera person in the hallway, or for the executive producers make it to the reject reels and make it look like they were sung for the judges.   The reason the screen is behind the contestants head is so they can very easily  "cut and paste"  footage from that room.   You know the screen, the one that I said is purple this year (it looks hot pink on screen, I discovered tonight),  and has different Idols heads (sometimes leaving out Reuben Studdard), that's the screen in question.  The reason it's so blurry and graphic is so that you won't notice if someone is in a slightly different spot between takes.   And I've said it before, but I'll say it again,  other than the shots where the judges are dancing, hugging, or sometimes (as we saw tonight) even stripping with the contestants,  you will NEVER see judge and contestant in the same frame.   It goes from contestants head to judges head to contestants head to judges head.  This is so they can cut and paste different pieces of audition.  I'm unclear on whether they re-film some things if they come out poorly, or just go back and use footage from the Executive Producer rounds.   I'd like to give them the benefit of the doubt and say that they do not use footage from the Executive Producer rounds, (because that's sort of unfair even though they tell you they might), but
it's no accident that I had so many cameras in my audition.  They say it's so that they can "screen test you and get a feel for what you will look like on camera,"  -- but if that was true, they'd just look at the footage once they had it and if you didn't show up well, get rid of it.   They waste so much money on other footage at auditions I find that extremely hard to believe.
The locations were obviously patched together.   People from New Orleans know that the escalators contestants were coming down with their families and golden tickets are NOT in the New Orleans arena, that was Hilton Riverside hotel.  And the room with the view of the river and double doors with golden handles is a room called River, on one side of the Hilton Riverside.  The holding room that contestants were shown running back into to show their golden ticket to other contestants after their audition is called Compass, and is on a completely different side of the hotel.  It is nowhere near the River room.  So why run them back in there?  Just to get the reaction of the other contestants to their golden ticket?     Some of it makes no sense.  I would love to be able to sit in on one of their production meetings to find out how and why these decisions are made.  One thing is for sure, they'll never let me do that now!   Ha!

The exit interview
After my audition I walked out with no golden ticket (which was fully expected), the cameras and fake Seacrest were there to greet me.  What I mean by this is that there was an exit interview, just like you'd have if you were actually in the judges round of the show.  You come out, Seacrest asks how you did, what they said,  comments about things that happened in your audition, etc.   Even though neither the judges or Ryan Seacrest were at my final audition round, they still had this exit interview.  They said it was yet another way to screen test us and see how awesome we looked on camera.   The peculiar thing about this interview was that you were asked questions by this production person (I called him fake Seacrest)  or the camera men, but fake Seacrest was never seen on camera.      Because I had no one there with me hooting and hollering, I knew my exit interview would be rougher than most.  I was prepared.  I noticed a couple of things, 1) as stated before these people were asking you questions but not visible on camera,  2) the questions they were asking were very leading,  and 3) the questions they were asking were designed to bring out emotion in people.

Here's an example.  Someone comes out of the room.  A normal person might ask, "How did you do?"
Fake Seacrest would ask, "You look really upset.  Tell us why you're angry."
Big difference, right?

So my strategy for exit interview was as follows:
a) Begin each answer just like a man who's in trouble with his wife/girlfriend.  By repeating the question first.
b)  Say NOTHING that can be taken out of context
c)  Say EVERYTHING without raising my voice
d) Smile always
e)  If possible, make every statement as "unairable" as possible (without being rude or mean).

I was quite proud of myself.  I was asked something like, "You have no golden ticket, does that make you really really upset?"    and I responded  "Why would you think I'd be really really upset just because I have no golden ticket?  This was a wonderful experience and I'm proud of myself."   At another point they asked me if I would come back and audition again and I just smiled sweetly and said "I can't because I'm too old.  I would love to, though.  I sure will think differently about it when I watch it on TV though!"


Following contestants out
 I haven't seen much of it this season, but in past seasons there are always a few contestants (always the bad ones) who are followed out of the arena/hotel/conference center whatever.  They are shown walking through the corridors, down the escalators, out onto the streets, and sometimes all the way to the parking lot!   They usually are mouthing off at the cameras, flipping them the bird, crying, or displaying some other kind of equally ridiculous behavior.  I was always so angry at these people for behaving this way and hogging the attention of the cameras for so long, even after it was clear they weren't going to have a shot on the show.

In New Orleans, there was this one kid who was really sweet, but really not a great singer.  He went in, was told he was bad, and left.  He came outside and gave a respectable exit interview.  He was with his Mom or Grandma who was a little nuts, and he was a little off also, but he was nice and respectful.  He was obviously trying very hard not to cry.  They just kept badgering him and asking more questions, faster, and faster.  At one point fake Seacrest and camera man were practically double-teaming him.   He became overwhelmed and knew he was going to cry so he just lowered his head, said "Thank you"  and walked away.  I was so proud of the kid.  But low and behold, camera man (fake Seacrest stayed to torment the next victim, or maybe to apply some fake Seacrest hair-gel) took off walking after the kid, still asking him questions.  He just lowered his head even more in shame, sunk his shoulders, and kept walking.  He did not flip off the camera.  He did not scream.  He did not turn around.  He didn't do anything he shouldn't have done.  He just kept walking.  And they followed him down the escalators and out the doors as he tried to hide his tears.   When I saw that I had tears to hide as well.  I'm not trying to be over dramatic here, I know the kid knew this was a possible outcome and risk-- I just don't see the need to follow someone who is not purposely doing anything for attention.  I'll never forget that dude- if you are out there please message me!  I'd love to buy you a drink.


That's it for this round... stay tuned for post #9, coming up soon.

The Truth about American Idol Auditions, Part 7

Executive Producer Round, continued

My audition
I've been dreading writing about this actual part (can't you tell by all of the parts that proceeded this post?)  and I'm not sure why.  I'm sure it's a lot easy to write about "I got through and I'm going to Hollywood"  than it is to say "they hated me",  but I wasn't embarrased and I thought I did as well as possible under the circumstances.  I tried to hold my head as high as possible and never say anything negative while I was there.   I tried not to be rude to anyone, even people like FlagBoy or Brick (although I was a LITTLE rude to her after she pushed me over my limits), I tried to look nice (not slutty),  and I was constantly trying to take the smart approach of evaluating what was really happening (what the producers were saying to me versus what they were actually writing down about me) and I think those are all the reasons why it wasn't a whole lot worse.

I wore jeans, silver sparkly flip flops, and a silver sparkly tank top.  I was thinking that I wanted to stand out but not appear crazy,  that I wanted something slightly sexy but not skanky, and normal.   I was considering that we would have to wear the same thing for four days so I couldn't wear anything that needed to be dry-cleaned,  and I was thinking about the fact that we'd be standing for hours at a time (hence the flip flops), and that we'd be outside in the New Orleans heat for a lot of it (hence the tank top).   I won't here for obvious reasons but if anyone would like to see a picture of what I wore, feel free to ask.   truedat504@gmail.com   --  I also have a video of me singing the song as I did at the actual audition, wearing the same exact thing (I shot it the night after the arena day).

As for song choice, I've worked professionally as a classical singer.  That's not to say that I'm a really really good singer, I'm not.   But, I can read music, stay on pitch 99% of the time, and have worked professionally doing both opera and musical theatre for years.  I'm also a union opera singer.  So, I'd be lying if I said I had absolutely no experience or idea what I'm doing, but I'm not the greatest either.  I'm a phenomenal chorister, but just a so-so soloist.  If that makes sense.      But, I have watched American Idol for 9 years, I know it's about pop music and just recently R&B and rock music, and I know that anyone who sings opera gets made fun of.   I wasn't going to disclose opera at all.  I specifically left it off of all of my interview sheets, all of my questionnaires, and everything else.  I talked about my job, my school training,  my volunteer work, everything but that.  I knew better.   But at some point, in one of the legal disclosure forms, I had to by law disclose if I was in a professional singing union.  Crap.   So I did.

So I get to the audition fully prepared.  I'm going to sing "Barracuda" by Heart, and if they ask for another song, I'll sing "Come Away with Me"  by Norah Jones.   I had vocal nodules many years ago (blisters on your vocal chords) so I have this really really weird vibrato thing going on.   I sound generally ridiculous singing pop music because of that and the classical training combined, but I generally can do a pretty good job of faking 70s and 80s hair music where people half scream with vibrato, and Norah Jones has some of those same elements in her voice as well so I figured I was pretty good with that.  I posted some videos on YouTube for critique, asked some of my friends who run recording studios and bands,  asked some of my professional singer friends, etc.  I worked relatively hard on trying to pick the right songs for me.

I wait for Jessica to go in, she does, I hear her singing, it's great, I'm nervous... I'm waiting for her to come out and even though they are shooing me into the curtained area in between the waiting room and the singing room, I want to see her come out and hold out long enough to get a chance to.  She got a golden ticket.  Awesome.  I was happy for her but it made me even more nervous.

I enter the room.  It looks EXACTLY the same as what it does on TV.   Except for a few things.   Simliarities:  the big obnoxious American Idol wallpapered wall is behind where I'm standing.  You know this wall... every year they change it, sometimes it's red, sometimes blue, sometimes green, this year it's purple.  It's got big silhouettes of past idols, sometimes their big heads, sometimes even less successful Idols like Reuben Studdard are included, sometimes they aren't, sometimes there is a head or body with a ?  on it that means it could be you, you know what I mean.  More Similiarities:  judges table complete with Coca Cola cups,  PA's with clipboards sitting in the corner,  wooden floor that's been laid down,  obnoxiously large American Idol circle logo laid onto the floor for you to step on (that thing is LITERALLY four inches off of the ground, it is a HUGE step),  open glass wall with a view of the river,  big microphone above your head.    Differences:  HUGE microphone above your head,  three or four camera men with grips holding other microphones,  three or four cameras,  about 20 assistants in the corner, and aside from the three judges, about 10 other people on each side.  So it's you, alone, staring at least 15 people in the face with another 10-20 watching.     (I didn't mention this before but that was the thing that shocked me about Mel's room.  That room, although small, had a long table that was lined with about 10-12 producers. Talk about pressure!)   More differences:  an "x" marks the spot on the obnoxious 4 inch high American Idol logo indicating where you should stand, and which way your face should point.

I give a quick introduction, I think they may have cut me off to tell me to sing my first song.  I sing Barracuda, Mel laughs at me.  I think I see her mouth "I told you"  to Ken.   I immediately understand why she passes me through, she thinks I'm hilarious.   I glare at her and she puts her clipboard over her face.   I get through 3 or 4 whole lines this time before Ken stops me and asks me why I'm screaming.  He asks me something about being a union singer and I admit that I do sing opera.  He asks me to sing opera.  KNOWING where this is now going I politely decline.  I start singing the Norah Jones song.  He cuts me off and again asks me to start singing opera.  Of course he wants to hear  "O Mio Babbino Caro."  That's the only song that ANYONE ever wants to hear.   Opera singers know what I'm talking about.  I tell him I'm not doing that because it's too overdone, and as a private joke to myself I ask if he'd like to hear some Phantom?   Haha, I thought that was hilarious, personally.  He didn't get the joke.  I didn't think he would.   He tells me I can either sing opera or get out.  I considered this for a minute knowing the hell the camera man would give me if I was not cooperative in the after-interview.   I sing a German piece a) because I love it,  b) because it's German and there was no way to use English words against me out of context later (example, someone singing "Aint' no sunshine when she's gone"  and rearranging the words and melody so that it sounds like a bad "You are my sunshine"... not saying they actually do that but I wouldn't put it past them with everything else I saw).  and c) I took some delight in knowing that none of the producers had ever heard it before.  

After I finished singing Ken Warwick asks me a little about myself, I tell him a little more about myself, and he responds "you seem like a nice girl, really you do, but everything you sing sounds like a nun."   A NUN?  I was so shocked.  I expected to hear many things, the typical British "that's dreadful,"  or something like that, but I've never ever been told I sing like a nun.  And I've even PLAYED nuns before in productions!  Ha!   So without thinking, I respond, "nuns are good."    and I thank them for their time, smile graciously (into all 3 cameras),  turn around and walk out.

Stay tuned for the after-interview... that's a very important part of this whole thing as well.  But I have to tell you,  hahahaha, when I saw my mother and told her what they said, the FIRST thing she said is, "Nuns are good!    I like nuns!"     hahaha.  Awesome.    That, (aside from the charbroiled oysters) was easily the best part of my day!

The Truth about American Idol Auditions, Part 6

Executive Producer Round, continued

The Families
I mentioned before why I didn't bring any family or friends with me, but the one reason I was kind of sad that I didn't is because the atmosphere was pretty hostile, at least towards me.  There were some fast cliques, like guitar guys, or jewelry girls, or whoever.  There were also some good souls that were nice to everyone regardless of what they personally thought about their chances, like Jorge.   There were some people that were so crazy that they would talk for hours to anyone, whether or not the other person was actually listening.  But most everyone was the same:  they would talk excitedly to the 2 or 3 people they made "friends" with,  stop to listen when someone like JoJo girl would sing, but mainly would be wrapped up in their own little world, listening to music, and would look at you like you were crazy if you tried to start up a conversation with them.

I expected nerves to be high, but I didn't expect an atmosphere like that.  People would run over to their families and jump up and down and yell and cheer and scream, and then come sit down and not say a word for an hour.  People would ask you a million questions "I've done three TV shows, how many have YOU been on?"  or list their impressive accomplishments.  People would ask you to sing and then turn up their noses right at you, or say things like "maybe Garth Brooks isn't the best choice for you, sweetie,"  or "that was cute, but you sang it really loud."    I was shocked by the way I suddenly felt like I was in Junior High again,  that everyone was judging my hair and nails and clothing and the cool kids were going to put me down so they could feel cooler.  It was a really tense environment.   As a contrast, I went to another audition recently for another show (as mentioned before), and I was afraid of it based on this experience.  But, I was so surprised when I got there, everyone was friendly, everyone talked to you,  people told you stories about their husbands and kids, their little babies at home, their medals they got at church, just, whatever.  Everyone was rooting for everyone (and not just because you were supposed to for the scouts) but because they wanted everyone to do well.  Afterwards people hung out, we still talk to each other weeks later.  

I've wondered why these differences occured, and I've come up with two main reasons.  1)  The other show I auditioned for was a chance of a lifetime, also, but it's not something you have to have a particular skill or talent for.  It helps to know what you're doing, but it's not neccessary.    American Idol is a talent thing and people watch it SO carefully and scrutinize every move of every contestant that it becomes extremely stressful.  The contestants also get into a mindset of "if I can't make it my career is over"  and  because many of them ONLY do music, it's "if my career is over I have nothing left."  So it's just this very very tense vibe.
2)  Forgive me if you take offense to this or do not agree, but I mentioned before that of the people at the audition, I only found 4 that were from New Orleans.   My other audition we were 90% Louisiana born and bred, and it was apparent by the "How's ya Mom and thems?"  all over the place.   This one had people from Florida, Texas, Arkansas, all over.  So it's no wonder that I found the people to behave very very differently from what I'm used to.

Break for Lunch
So, after about 15 people go into the executive producer round, we get a lunch break.  I go ask around and see if a few people want to have lunch together, they all decline.  Many of them are with their families and that's understandable but even the 2 or 3 that are alone are going off in sets of 2.  I'm surprised that no one wants to eat together and even more surprised that no one wants to ask the girl who's actually from New Orleans what to eat, but whatever... less of a line at Drago's for me!  Mmm charbroiled oysters.    We have some ridiculous amount of time to eat lunch and be back, if we are late and miss our number we could be cut.  Since I'm #4 or #5 to audition when we return, I definitely want to arrive back early.  I believe we had 30 minutes and even though I was just going to the hotel lobby to eat, I knew it wouldn't be enough time. 

The most annoying girl of all time
I probably should have mentioned this girl in one of the previous posts, but just thinking about her makes my blood boil so I guess I waited until I could get it all out.   A girl seated very close to our five person group that morning turned to me and asked me the following question.  "So, like, do you think this is going to take awhile?  Because I have to go to my job and I didn't take off and my boss will like kill me if I'm late."     I remind her as civilly as I can manage that the last round took all day, and they said this round could take even longer.  I also point out that the sheet we were given says in print we'd be there at least six hours.   "oh crap,"  she whines "but I can't afford to miss work.......  I wonder if they will let me go first?"   I roll my eyes at her and shrug.   I want to tell her off but at this point I'm still trying to make friends.  I don't remember her name either, Jamie?  She must have been about 17 or 18... she told me what she did, I think she was a waitress or a temp, I don't really remember.  Some job all college kids have.  It also really bothered me that most people (aside from the costumed)  were in really nice jeans or pants and a killer top and makeup,  some in dresses/skirts, most presentable, and this girl was in ripped jeans, flip flops, a tank top with her different colored bra strap hanging out, and wet hair twisted up into a clip, with zero makeup on.  I kid you not.  Did she not realize she was going to be on TV?   She catches me looking at her hair and says "oh... haha, I was too lazy to blow dry it this morning."     Seriously?  Why are you even here?   I make a mental point to ignore everything she said for the rest of the day so I didn't lose my cool.  Jorge and Jessica and a few other people did make conversation with her and I think Jessica really liked her, but I just couldn't tolerate her.  She whined non-stop for the next four hours about how long it was taking.  I think at one point I may have said "if it's that miserable, leave, but you can't come back and this is a once in a lifetime opportunity for you,"  but she just said "like, we'll see what happens."     I know my memories are fuzzy because this happened awhile back, I remember being seated very close to her, I'm wondering if she was even in our 5 group of J names and I'm remembering one of the guys wrong.  Either way.  She annoyed me.  We will call her Brick from now on, because you guessed it, she's dumb as one.

Break for Lunch #2
So for the lunch break the Idol producers come in and give us the following orders.   We are supposed to take our coveted big sticker off (and it is DIFFICULT to get those off of your clothing without ripping them),  place them on the back of the chair we are sitting in (to keep our place),  they will put a family wristband on us (so we can get back into the black curtain), and we can then go.  We are under NO circumstances allowed to roam the hotel freely with our big sticker on (whoops, I had done that at least 10 times already to go to the bathroom and the gift shop, and had even talked to a few people who asked me how auditions were going and if Randy was there),  and then we'd return back, change out the armband for the sticker, etc.    This is all important for 3 reasons.  1)  Security was amazing and it was ridiculous to me how they had to put the armband on you (you couldn't do it yourself),  you didn't get an armband until your sticker was on your chair, and it was a very authoritative process, but I guess I expected that.  2)  When I went down to the bar to eat my lonely oysters, I found my Mom and Aunt who were there to surprise me so I got to eat a fabulous lunch and even though the bill didn't come in time I still made it because they stayed and paid-- I have NO idea how anyone who didn't have someone "on the outside" made it back within the 30 minutes,  and 3) when I returned from lunch, we found that Brick had written on her sticker on her chair "Sorry, I had to leave.  Won't be returning."     Total shock occured, they alerted a producer, he took her sticker away, which meant that I was now auditioning 4th instead of 5th.

The Truth about American Idol Auditions Part 5

Executive Producer Round, Continued

The People
As I stated before, I met many interesting people throughout my journey, as you can well understand.  Just a disclaimer before we start:  *if anyone appears here, please do NOT penalize them in any way, it's me posting about them, not them--- they signed release agreements but had no idea I was posting this about them and it's without their consent*.   I was refraining from mentioning too many details or people's names before, but I realize now that that's just not any fun.   :)   So here goes...

Let's backtrack a little, to Day 1.  I went with my friend and partner-in-crime Javier, who I have to tell you did fabulously.  He also at one point (we were delirious) strapped his iPhone to his backpack strap and walked around and filmed everything that happened to us for a couple of hours.  It was probably the most hilarious video ever made, so we will have to see if we can convince him to let me post some of it here.

On Day 2 Javier unfortunately didn't make it, so I lost him at the tables on the floor of the arena, but at that moment in my small group of 4 I met my first interesting person and pseudo-friend Reagan.  Reagan is gorgeous, blonde-hair, skinny, dressed like you would think Carrie Underwood might if she was just hanging about.  She sang a really sweet little Colbie Calliat song, and it was good.  Not amazing, but really solid.   She also dates Jeff Charleston, who plays for the New Orleans Saints and was an active player in the Superbowl that we won (WHO DAT), so the judges were eating her up for that.  She got a star, and a Y, two amazing things to have on the ticket, and I saw cameras interviewing and featuring her all day.  I'd be shocked if we didn't see something about her tonight.     The only other people I met throughout the interview and media training was this girl who was dressed as a sexy referree.  She's a personal nanny for a famous celebrity comedian who you definitely have heard of, so that made her interesting as well.  Plus she was dressed as a sexy referree.  I never heard her sing.  She fell asleep in media training, ha!  She asked me to "take notes for her".  I had the feeling she was the kind of girl in high school who asked nerds to do her homework.  There are a few crazies too, and a few super young 15 year old and 16 year old kids (with their parents),  but other than that I didn't talk to anyone much.    Mainly just people bragging about how amazing they were, and me trying to figure out if they were good or bad.

Day 3 (at the Hilton Riverside) is where, obviously, I met more of the people and made the more lasting relationships.  I already mentioned the people in costume,  (naughty referee was the other day so she wasn't there), but Pochahontas was okay, Dorothy left a PILE of red glitter EVERYWHERE she went,  Saintsation had a bunch of other real Saintsations with her so that was sort of cool (should have asked if they knew Reagan but didn't), and a fairy here and there.  Mostly just a bunch of New Orleans masks and feathers and things like that.  

Some people had possees.  Most people had one-three people with them.  There were less than 5 people that didn't have anybody with them (I was one of those people... I figured there was a really good chance I would not be portrayed favorably and I didn't want to bring my family along for that ride, plus you had to take off at this point 2 days of work for this whole thing)...  one girl in particular from Mississippi had over twenty people with her.  It was obvious who they were because the entire crowd was wearing hot pink and waving hot pink boas and signs and pictures of her face on them.  I can't imagine how much pressure I would feel if I had an entourage like that waiting for my golden ticket, but to each his/her own, I guess.  I can't remember her name, but I want to say something like Ashley or Caitlin, or one of those.  She was young.  She was good, from what I remember, and had some sort of previous experience, beauty pageants maybe.  I'd be shocked if they didn't feature her either, just by the size of her crowd.  And everyone knew at this point that the judges weren't going to be there (at least I think they had to have, unless they don't watch the show at all),  so to bring that many people that far just for another prelim round is very gutsy.  But at the same token, they probably don't say no to people who have that many people with them, and that might be another thing she was banking on.

We talked about Jorge,  he was the sweetest kid I've ever met.  He was so nervous and kept listening to his cd player (read, not mp3 player or iPod), but actual Discman, yes, it's true,  and even played his song for me.  He helped ease some of my fears and gave positive feedback to everyone around him.  I really like him and hope he reads this and tries to get in touch with me :)   I heard he made the Top 40 and am very pleased with that!   You will probably think he looks familiar, as I mentioned before, he was in some kind of Menudo search when he was even younger.  I think he's 16 or 17 now, but this was when he was 13 or 14.
You can view Jorge Gabriel here: (make sure you look at the Jorge Gabriel, 13 and not the one that just says Jorge). http://www.mtv.com/mtvsites/mtvtr3s/menudo/   - another one that I will be shocked not to see tonight.  

Jessica was the red-head who was beautiful and a cosmetologist, she brought along her husband and mother... not sure she'll be on tonight but she was very sweet.  She sang country music.

This girl, I cannot remember her name, but she was an AMAZING singer.  Everyone was singing or humming in the holding room.  Jessica at one point asked her what she sang, and she broke into SVW's Weak, "I get so weak in the knees, I can hardly speak..."  it stopped every single person, who immediately ceased singing/humming/playing guitar/talking about how great they were,  just to look at her and listen to her song.  Afterwards everyone erupted into mad applause.  It was seriously impressive.  You can see her in this clip, she's the girl in a black studded top and black leather pants with curly hair, who says something like "I'm like in a dream bubble."   -   Apparently she sings R&B in bars in her hometown, and is poor, but her community raised money for her to participate.  She did make it through the Exec producer round, and although she put up this "I'm tough, I sing R&B" image throughout the entire day, she started crying like a baby (and her grandparents, who were with her), and rightfully so.  Watch out for her tonight!  She reminds me of an older version of JoJo:   Turns out this was Erin Kelly!
  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PtK8nqNXe9M

There were a few guys who were the ringleaders of the guitar gang, and were playing, and singing all day, and were surrounded by a circle of other contestants.. They were wildly popular.  Everytime I looked at them I remembered previous seasons audition videos were people like David Cook & Ace were the ones doing that in their rooms, and look at how that turned out!  Neither of these boys (one had a bandana on) made it, everyone was SHOCKED.  They kept saying, "bandana guy didn't make it! WHAT!?"  or "if bandana guy can't make it, I'm done."

There was a really sweet red-head guy, who came with his mom and red-head sister who had some sort of problem where she had casts on both legs and was in a wheelchair. But she seemed in good spirits, and I did see him on the previews last night, so we're sure to see him as well.   I couldn't figure out all day whether he was good or bad, but I guess we'll find out!  Update... turns out this was none other than 16 year old Brett Loewenstern!

Finally, there was this girl who had been through the audition SEVERAL times before.  I think this was like fourth or fifth time auditioning.  She had been to Hollywood as well.  She gave everyone pointers, and kept talking about how this was her last year (she was 28, like me).  She was pretty bossy, also, but I guess that's just in her personality.   She was shown on the previews for tonight, her name escapes me, but Steven Tyler makes some comment about "where did you get those lips?".  The only thing I remember about her, other than her blonde hair and glasses, is that I think she had yellow painted nails.   Turns out that this was Sarah Sellers!   I had a pretty impressive group, right??

There were a few crazies too.  There was this one guy who kept showing off his Backstreet Boys songs and moves, and he made it through!   There of course was Flag guy, and he made it through also.  He very proudly gave a wack-job interview afterwards with his Grandmother and another lady, I think his aunt or Mother, who seemed to be kind of wacky as well.  I guess I expected that.  (I did a great job of picking the important people... they were the same ones who were featured on the show.   Smile/Flag Guy took up the first 15-20 seconds of the New Orleans episode).

If I find more pictures or videos of people I know or recognize, I will be sure to post them here as well.

The Truth about American Idol Auditions, part 4

 The Executive Producer Room

So, where we left off last night, 4/5 of my small group had made it through to the Executive Producer room and was sitting in the courtyard area of the River Room.   Here's the setup:

Telling It Like It is...

Feel free to click on the above link to get an even bigger picture of the audition room, so you can understand the basic setup.   I am seated in row 2 of contestant chairs.  There is one row in front of me, filled in with people, and everything next to us and behind us is empty (waiting for people to come out of the small room).   Directly in front of us are a set of double doors,  a bunch of PAs, a cameramen, people trying to arrange potted plants (one on each side of the set of double doors), and some other random people.  To our left is the open area where we entered the black curtain, and to the left of that is the near/far chair setups for the small room we discussed in the last post.  Behind us and to our right is a Sports Bar type of area, that is enclosed by half wall/half colums.  The families are all seated in this area and they are not allowed to leave it.  It gives them a partially obscured view of the double doors but they can still sort of see if they stand up. 
In the little nook that the Sports Bar created between it and the wall, there is a group of 5 or 6 contestants that have been there a long time by now, so they have all made friends.  They have vacated their chairs (the ones starting at 1, 2, 3)   and are pow-wowing on the floor playing guitar and singing.    I am sitting behind the 3 stick figure people in the chairs with Jessica again on my left and Jorge again on my right.

We don't know how the executive producer round is going to work yet, but we are told it will start as soon as everyone is in the room.  That makes us very uncomfortable because only 25 or so chairs have been filled and there are clearly a lot more behind us.  2-3 new people trickle in every few minutes, after they go through the small room.   It's about ten or eleven by this point, we haven't eaten anything of substance since at least seven and many of us have been there since six.  I am starving but am still nibbling on the granola bars, fruit, and other random things in my bag.  Some kids parents have brought them chips and things out of the vending machines.  We are explicity told that when the round starts, if our number is called, and we are not there, we will be cut, no questions asked, they will not come to find us.   I think at least at one point this occured where the person was not there and they DID make an effort to find them (and the person came yelling and screaming) and was allowed to audition.  Why the person wandered off to begin with is beyond me.

Eventually some sort of producer (if you haven't figured out yet, Idol has at least 8-10 producers, and 3-4 executive producers.  Most famous are Ken Warwick, who I actually met that day, and Nigel Lythgoe who sadly was NOT present -- he's famous from "So You Think You Can Dance."  - it's basically the same group of 3-4 Brits who are responsible for about 15 reality TV shows,  and about 8-10 Americans.)     So the producer comes out and explains the process (you may want to refer back to the handy dandy picture I drew for you):

Contestants are seated in ORDER, by contestant number.  (At this point I realize, I think, that even though on audition day #2 we auditioned according to ticket number, our contestant numbers handed out on the yellow tickets were according to producer, and our groups of five were done by contestant number.  So, in other words, Jessica's contestant number was the next highest from mine, and Jorge's the next lowest).  So we're all still sort of still in our 5 person groups, or what's left of them, and we're seated in order by the number on our stickers.   I also realize just how many people were cut at the New Orleans arena, because the gaps in our numbers are HUGE.   I saved my sticker to upload for you all (I wasn't supposed to) but it tore into a million pieces.  I did manage to sneak a picture of my original golden ticket before they took it away from me (gotta love smart phones), so I will try to upload that one at some point.        So, contestants are seated in order.  The very first three people to audition/make it through this far are seated in chairs that I marked on the picture 1, 2, 3, and it continues that way down the row, and then snakes around to the three chairs behind where the three stick figures are drawn.  That's us,  then it goes down that row, and snakes around, and back down the other row, and so forth and so on.   The PA's are making sure you sit where you need to be seated.   

As people go into the room, this is the drill:
1.  chair 1 and 2 stand up and go into the room, these are contestant #1, and c2, respectively.   C1 goes straight to the judges.  C2  stays in the curtain area just through the door with the PA.    Before C1 comes out for the infamous "yellow ticket reveal",  C2 goes into another area in between curtain area and audition area.   Meanwhile, C3 and C4 are moving into chairs 1 and 2, and the entire line must pick up all of their things and move down the line.  Every five minutes.  Talk about already being nervous, now you're having to make yourself uncomfortable again every few minutes and keep track of all of your stuff (if you don't have someone with you to hold it).      While C1 and C2 are still in the room,  PA's are going to find C1's family and C2's family.  C1's family is placed outside of the double door, and C2's family is taken out of the Sports Bar and put on standby.    C1 then comes out,  there is lots of screaming from C1's family (or crying, whatever the case may be), and then a brief camera interview occurs (more on this as well later).   C2's family then gets placed on potted plant detail for the next big reveal. 

Meeting Ken Warwick
 Finally someone comes to us and tells us we are about to start this process.   Contestant 1 and C2 go inside the room and apparently are not very good because neither comes out with golden tickets (shock to all of us because they were both the super-popular strumming the guitar guys who play in bands in real life and we are flabbergasted).   I think a few more people went in and came out unsuccessfully as well, but I'm unsure how many, less than ten.  The room is very tense, and there is no noise.   I guess this justifies a visit from Ken Warwick because he gets out of the audition room and comes out to meet us.  He introduces himself, there is wild applause, he tells us he likes the city, he makes a few jokes. He tells us that the reason he is there is because this is standard procedure, but also because he doesn't know who the judges are going to be.  (Keep in mind, this is just a few weeks after Simon "retired"  and it was in this same week that Kara DioGuardi was fired).  He mentions that there is a lot of "buzz in the air"  about the entire situation and people are worried, but don't be, he is finding new judges and it will be a great Season 10.  He lets us know that personally he hates all of the contestants from Season 9 and thinks they are the most boring bunch of indivuduals he ever saw.  He knows that's why ratings dropped.  He is really trying to amp up Season 10, and is sure it will be the best ever.  Back to our auditions...  He tells us that we are there to IMPRESS him and so far we have been anything but.  He reminds us that we are auditioning and need to show a lot of energy.  He reminds us that we learned the song "Billionaire" because he wants to test how well we can learn music in a pinch, and that if we're on the show we could potentially be learning 5 new songs a week between the group songs, music video songs, our actual song, and in later rounds 2-3 songs per show.  He tells us that so far not one of the contestants has been able to sing the song well, and no one knows the rap.  He wonders why no one bothered to learn the rap?   He wishes us well, says it's nice to meet us, and goes back into the room.  There is wild applause. 

My initial reactions to Ken Warwick
I realize he is very British, sarcastic/dry sense of humor, cute accent but very cut and dry.  I realize he is probably a total asshole in real life, even though he put on good airs today.  I don't find it hard to believe at all that he got along well with Simon Cowell.  I think he's a great businessman, he obviously knows we are curious about the news of the new judges and he comes right out and tells us the reason and not to worry about it,  he changes the topic and gets us thinking about the audition again, AND he sets us up for extreme failure by telling us to give more energy AND reminding us again about the Billionaire song, and of course wanting people to rap because a) they can't get the full song together if no one does the middle verses of it and b) people rapping is even sillier than people singing badly.

This post is long enough already!  Going to post it now so you guys can read it, and when I return you'll have a detailed account of MY exact audition,  what the families did, and who the other contestants were and what they did.   To Be Continued...

The Truth About American Idol Auditions, part 3

So, here we are again 6 months later.   The New Jersey Idol auditions aired tonight, the New Orleans ones (the ones I participated in) are airing tomorrow.  Sorry it took me so long to post this, but partially I didn't because I was still afraid of pending legal action and it's difficult for me to go farther into my story (and what actually happened) without giving myself away.  Part of it though was because I was so saddened and discouraged by this entire experience that I was unable to bring myself to think about it until I was forced to do so this week.   I'll write an opinion post at a later date (because believe me I DEFINITELY have an opinion).  This used to be my #1 favorite show of all time and now I couldn't even watch the New Jersey auditions without physically becoming ill.   But for now, we'll just continue with the facts.

The callbacks (continued)


When my story last left off, myself and a group of about 125 other semi-finalists had assembled at the Hilton Riverside in New Orleans for our second set of auditions.   We sat in a large room, learned the words to the tune "Billionaire",  and were split up into about 25 groups of 5.    There were a few people in costume (a Pocahontas, Saintsation, and Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz),  and a few people I recognized.  There was a guy named Dave Pittman who suffered from Tourette's syndrome who was from Dallas a few years ago and had made it all the way through to Hollywood (or maybe even farther, I can't remember).  I remembered him because they featured him.  Really a sweet guy.  There's also another girl who had auditioned SEVERAL times....  had made it to Hollywood at least twice.  Her name escapes me right now but she was featured at the end of tonight's episode with Steven Tyler asking her "where did you get those lips?"    But I digress again.  More on each contestant later.

So, we met everyone and learned our song, now my small group of 5 is sitting in the small Guantanamo Bay type holding room with two assistants.   I nickname my group the "J's plus me"  because of the 5 of us, I'm the only person that does not have a name that starts with a J.    There's a beautiful red-head named Jessica on my left who is there with her mother &  equally beautiful husband for support, and she is a cosmetologist,  there's Juan, there's an African-American fellow with a fro and his name escapes me right now (but I promise you it starts with a J),  or maybe one of them was Jovann and fro dude was Juan?  I'm not sure at this point anymore, and on my right is my favorite friend & compatriot of the day, Jorge.  Jorge has previously auditioned for a Menudo reality TV series and made it very far, he also is very talented and from Florida.  From what I have been hearing he has already made the top 40 and perhaps even the top 24.   But more on individuals later!

We know after this intense holding room we are going to be brought to the tough female judges room.  If we "pass" her (her name is Mel)  she will remove our small sticker and replace it with a large one, and then we will go into another holding room waiting for the Exec Producers.

After about 45 intense minutes in the room from hell, the PA's arrive to let us know we're being moved.   We go all the way across the hotel to rooms called River & Port  (these are some of the most beautiful rooms in the hotel and have a perfect view of the Mississippi, I've been here before for weddings).  I automatically realize that THIS is the room they are going to use for the actual airing because the judges usually sit in front of a wall of glass.  I also realize that the Exec Producers are going to be in this room and are going to have it set up EXACTLY the way it will be for the actual judges.  I was right on both of those counts.   The small room is an itty bitty little conference room very near the other two.      Since River and Port have an open courtyard type area attached to them, they had heavy black curtains hung to  keep the public in the hotel from seeing what was past that point.  You could sort of hear what was going on behind (if it was loud clapping or screaming) but you couldn't see anything.  Unless you had either a wristband (family)  or a contestant sticker (contestant), you were not getting past that curtain.  Also to note is that they had security who physically checked your body and bags going in and out of that curtain.

When we got close enough to the curtain to hear what was going on, we immediately realized that something CRAZY was happening.  We heard a male voice singing "Smile" at the top of his lungs... you know the tune, it's a  quiet, endearing little song, "smile, though your heart is aching, smile even though it's breaking,"...   only he is screeching it, and it is very very bad.  I'm not one to judge and give everyone the benefit of the doubt, but it is AWFUL.  And it is LOUD.    My first thought was "what on earth is THAT?"  but my second thought was "and why can we hear it?"   I knew that all of the judges were behind closed doors.   I mentioned that to the others but they were too nervous and consumed with fear to even think about it. As soon as we got through the curtain I looked to my right and saw this adorable (but strange) little blonde haired boy, dressed kind of how you'd expect to see Forrest Gump,  nice white dress shirt, slacks, loafers, passionately waving an American Flag for the cameras (at least 2 of them are now in his face), and talking to them.   I assume this is some sort of interview and they asked him to give a preview (or repeat, I wasn't sure) performance.    He's in the "standing' group of contestants.

This area is kind of difficult to picture so let me try very quickly to break it down.  There are 4 sets of 5 contestants.   5 who have just entered the room ( us),   5 who have recently entered and are standing (flag boy's group),  5 who are seated on the far side of the room, and 5 who are seated nearest the door.     The 5 who are seated nearest the door go into Mel's room one at a time,  she cuts them or bigger-stickers them and sends them out.  Once the entire group of 5 has gone, they then remove them from the seats, the far group goes to the near chairs, the standing group sits, and the next group comes in, and so forth, and so on.     This means that my group of 5 got to see 3 separate groups of 5 go before us.    Group 1 had 2 or 3 people make it.  Group 2 only had 1.   Group 3 goes in and I can't remember how many people made it.  All I can remember is one of the most important things of the day:

If a contestant is CUT, and they act CRAZY,  they will put them back in so that they can air the reaction on the show.


I know you're smart, dear reader, or else you wouldn't be here already, so you probably know where this is going.  Let me spell it out for you anyway (just because the details are delicious).   So, Flag Boy (I knew his name, wish I could remember it, but we'll all know tomorrow because I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that they will air him) goes into his room and sings Smile.  We can hear it through the door this time, but barely.  He doesn't last longer than 10 seconds before he comes out with a small sticker, cut.   He immediately starts crying HYSTERICALLY.    The cameras swarm on him.   He has at least 2 or 3 cameras on him again, the same ones from before.  They must have known to wait for him.   These cameramen are silent cameramen and usually don't talk but they are asking him questions and prompting him.. "why is this so important to you?"     He sobs: "because... I love... it!"       They ask: "why are you the next American Idol? what is so American about you?"      in a glimpse of brilliance I remember they saw him waving the American flag before hand, and sure enough, he whips it out and starts doing this 5 minute diatribe about how patriotic he is and how he loves it so much and he's actually shouting at some point...  there is total chaos and everyone is staring at him.   Suddenly the door to the small room opens, and I think that they are going to shut him up so the next girl can go in, but I realize they are summoning him back in.  He stays in the room 3-4 minutes (an awful long time for this set of auditions), and returns very proudly with his large sticker.  A contestant and on to the next round.    Imagine that.

I mentioned the silent cameramen, what I mean by that is that there are 2-3 cameramen who are doing some of the same shenanigans as in Large Room #1 -- they are circling you, filming close up of your face as you sit and worry, practice your music, etc.   Whenever you see the footage of the contestants waiting nervously in the holding rooms, that's from these silent cameras.  They are not with the judges, Seacrest, or fake Seacrest (just you wait),  they are just roaming getting footage.  They are not supposed to talk and only will unless they want, they NEED you to say something specific.       So, silent cameramen are in my face and in Jorge and Jessica's face and we're bracing ourselves to go into the small room.

My small group (just J's plus me)'s audition



Juan is first, he goes in, lasts about 2 minutes, comes out un-cut.  We all offer our congratulations.
Jessica is next, she goes in, lasts about 3 minutes, comes out un-cut.   Ditto.

I'm next.  I go in, and after 20 seconds (I'm barely through the first line of my song), I get a "you're in."  from Mel.     To give you an idea, I'm singing Barracuda by Heart.   I got as far as "So, this ain't the end, I saw you--"   before they stopped me.    I'm IMMEDIATELY paranoid.  I realize this is not good.  I know I'm already marked as an "N"  and I'm wondering why they are letting me through like this.  I know I'm not fantastic enough to have wowed anyone with 20 seconds, but I didn't think I was as crazy as Flag Boy either (and even he was cut the first time around),  so I'm really unsure what is going on.  All I keep reminding myself is that Mel was my original judge, I sang the same song, she wrote notes on me then that she has in front of her now, and she gave me positive feedback then, so she must remember what her opinions were and that's that.

I move outside, not as excited as everyone else was, and get the thumbs-up and congratulations from the group.

(More about this later, but unlike the game show I cannot mention because I actually am still a finalist and not yet disqualified where it was a completely 100% positive experience and I like all of the people I met very much and we were all there because we were good and rooting for each other no matter what, and we still talk to each other,  American Idol was very strange.  You knew people didn't want you to cry, but they didn't really want you to make it either, at least not if you were taking their spot.  There was this undertone of competitive harshness all day.  Most people didn't even eat lunch with each other on their lunch break.  But more on that... you guessed it, later!)

Jorge goes next and is in there forever and comes out super excited and through.   At this point everyone is excited because we realize that the other groups of five only had 3 people max get through, and we're now 4/4.

African American guy who's name I forget (but guarantee it started with a J) goes in next, and does not make it.  We all feel so sorry for him or at least say we do (I really did but I was so consumed with my own worries at that point)  and he leaves through the black curtain.  I felt especially bad given that 2 seconds before he went in the room we put a lot of pressure on him because the rest of us were in.

The rest of us cross the wooden floor into the courtyard just outside of the River room, where we are going to see the Executive Producers.   We are assigned chairs, there are already about 15 people who have made it here ahead of us.  There is space for about 30 behind us.  We sit and we wait.   Some people are handed water or chips by their parents or husbands or wives or sisters (I'm there alone by my own personal choice so I dig some stuff out of my bag),  we chat about how we think we did and we "meet"  the new people that are coming out of the small room as they come and join us.  We are no longer groups of 5 but one big block of people.   It's cordial again and some people are strumming guitars, and have left their assigned chairs to pow wow on the floor and play music.  Some are reading, some are reading sheet music.  Jorge is very nervously listening to his cd (I think it was Ricky Martin.. I don't remember, he played it for me).  Jessica is talking to a girl in front of us who is this R&B girl who is also in the previews and is an AMAZING singer.   She has curly hair and black leather pants on.   Her parents are with her, she is from Mississippi or Tennessee, she is poor and her church and community have raised funds for her to be here.  More on her later.      We are just basically hanging out, and waiting.

.... to be continued!